Catholic in the City: A Woman's Journey to Living Out Her Faith

In psychology, as an undergraduate, I learned about Pavlov's dog. Pavlov was a psychologist who trained dogs to behave in a certain way by introducing the same command. It is not a surprise that we also have "learned behaviors," such as, when our bladders get full we run to the restroom. Now, what if we change our own behaviors so to change the behavior of another? What if we change the behavior of another human being by introducing a new command? Is it a form of manipulation? Or, can it be a form of self-care if the new command you evoke helps your own well-being? Or is it a combination of both? In any relationship doesn't this sound like a game people play so that they can either feel good about a certain situation? Or control a situation? Is this game moral? As a form of self-care and possibly subconsciously as a form of manipulation, in that I wanted this man to miss me, I did not call or text my last romantic relationship for the past week. In all hon

“The more a daughter knows the details of her mother’s life…the stronger the daughter (The Red Tent, Anita Diamant, pg 2).” Imagine being a Hispanic woman at the age of twenty-one and your mother passing away from diabetes. Shortly after experiencing this tragic event you leave your homeland and migrate to an area uncharted by you or any of your family members. Then, with a Spanish accent, you are attempting to make it in academia and in the workforce concurrently, both of which in the early eighties was heavily infiltrated with middle class Anglo-men. I am aware that there are a lot of people who can relate to the challenges of this story, however, it affects me on a personal level because it is a brief snip-it of my mother’s life in her early twenties. Throughout all of her adversities and joy-filled moments she has sustained a strong faith and allowed God’s presence and providential care to nourish her. She has endured and simultaneously enjoyed a bountiful life. Because of w

Have you ever heard the church song "Friends"? The lyrics are as follow..."Packing up the dreams God planted in the fertile soil of you; Can't believe the hopes he's granted means a chapter in your life is through. But we'll keep you close as always; It won't even seem you've gone, cause our hearts are big and in small ways. Will keep the love that keeps us strong. And friends are friends forever. If the Lord's the Lord of them. And a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end. Though its hard to let you go, in the Father's hands we know that a lifetime's not too long to live as friends." This is the song that played at mass yesterday. If I were not at mass and having to display a "public face" I would have broken down crying! Letting go of a friend due to graduation or circumstance is a difficult thing to do. Praying and relying on God and His plan is all we can do in these scenarios. God will sust

Letting go. Everyone knows the saying if you set it free and it comes back to you then you know its yours. Focusing on the notion "set it free," for me, is the hardest part of this statement. The "it" can be many things - ego, pride, a grade, a city, friendships, or romantic relationships. Why is letting go so difficult? Is it because we think that whatever we are holding onto is fulfilling some need? Why is it so difficult to see letting go as something that can be positive? In my life letting go seems to be my theme. Every time I get close to a location, person, or situation - every time my desires for something that's either in my hands as a part of my immediate reality or potentially a part of my not-so-distant future - the reality or the dream has to be let go of. Does this make the dream, person, situation, or location that I have to let go of bad? No. So why is it hard to let go of? Not only does it have an intrinsic attraction to it but also

Several times since I have been in this ministry students, mainly women, have come into my office and talked to me about relationships that they or a friend are in that are emotionally abusive and spiritually unfulfilling . I usually ask them the questions, why do you, or your friend, remain in this relationship? What are you or your friend giving to this relationship and getting by remaining in this relationship? It is interesting to see the eyes of students open up when they realize that they are giving a lot more than they are receiving. They usually come to the realization that these relationships are not fulfilling because of the imbalance and emotional unavailability of their counterpart. So why do those not being fulfilled stay in these relationships? Simply put...because they do not love themselves enough. And they do not embrace the love God has abundantly graced them with. What is interesting is that this is not a phenomenon that happens merely in college. This is something t

When we are born into this world, we transitioned from being a thought in our parent's and God's heart to being a part of humanity. As life went forward we transitioned through many things, such as different grades in school, moving to new locations, through the joys, trials and tribulations of friendships, going away to college, beginning new jobs, getting married, and having children. Is life just one huge transition? How do we deal with transitions? What is the final transition? Being a Catholic I have faith that my final transition will be from this world into the arms of God. While this answer feels ambiguous because of the inability for it to be tangible in this world I do find comfort in the notion that the transitioning will finally end! Currently it feels as if my life has been in flux. Ten months ago I moved to Albuquerque, New Mexico to begin my first ministry position in campus ministry. I've read that moving to a new location on the stress scale is only second

"The unexamined life is not a life worth living." This is not an original idea. Last night as I was watching a TV show and this statement was questioned. If the unexamined life is not worth living, is there a limit to the examination? Can we over analyze situations and our own lives to the point that the questioning becomes irrelevant or pointless? I've been told many times in my life, mainly by men, that I think too much. So was Socrates, whom may I point out was a man, wrong when he stated the above quote? In my gut I say no. For example, when I was in and back from Juarez my inner core was shaken. If I was not moved by that experience and not examining my life I think I would become stagnant in my own growth as a more dynamic person. I would not be reaching towards my full potential. I would not be looking at humanity and relationships with an open mind. I would not examine my role within the cycle of poverty. If I do not integrate that experience into my life, my lif