Feb. 24th, 2011: The Unsung Heroes and Heroines of Our Parishes

(This article was written for the People of God, the Archdiocesan Newspaper for the Archdiocese of Santa Fe. It will be published in April.) Parish secretaries and receptionists, in my opinion, are the unsung heroes and heroines of our Catholic parishes. First, they greet all people who walk into our parish doors. They are the first face that all people meet and are the first impression of our parishes. Second, they tend to have many projects, atypical of a regular secretary or receptionist, which the parish needs to function. For example, many secretaries/receptionists put together the weekly bulletin, others schedule liturgical ministers, one particular secretary I just met does all the behind the scenes work for baptisms, weddings, and quinceañeras. Third, they interact with a population that is in desperate need of social services. Many times secretaries/receptionists receive walk-ins or phone calls from people in need of assistance for rent, utilities, food, clothing, and/or shelter. They attempt to connect people to services throughout our cities and towns.

On Wednesday, February 16th, at the Hotel Albuquerque, to better equip our church secretaries/receptionists with the knowledge of what social services exist in our counties, Catholic Charities, offered a free lunch and presentation to 60 church secretaries/receptionists; 28 parishes from Albuquerque, Santa Fe, Belen, Rio Rancho, and Corrales, were represented.

The afternoon started with a wonderful New Mexican meal catered by Hotel Albuquerque complimented by classical guitar playing by a local musician, Ben Chinisci. Following this we had a presentation given by myself, Rosie Chinea Shawver, and a representative from each of our five different centers (Center for Self-Sufficiency and Housing Assistance; Center for Community Involvement; Center for Educational Opportunity; Center for Immigration and Citizenship Legal Assistance; and Center for Refugee Settlement and Support) describing the services that Catholic Charities provides in the Archdiocese of Santa Fe. The afternoon reception ended with providing additional information on additional places, outside of Catholic Charities, where secretaries/receptionists can refer people to for social services in their counties.

In the afternoons final prayer we asked God to surround us and fill us His Spirit. We asked that we be a light for God’s people and to be salt for a community who is caught in the struggles of everyday life. In this brief encounter I had with the secretaries/receptionists from our parishes I am in awe of the ministry that they do and feel called to. They are the light in our parishes leading and caring for those who are drained by societal woes. Our secretaries/receptionists are the salt that helps us and others preserve their inherent, God-given, dignity and grow closer to whom Christ has called them to be. Next time you see your parish secretary/receptionist I urge you to thank them for their ministry.

Feb. 20th, 2011: Valentine's Day

I know this blog is about a week late but I still have a desire to write about Valentine's Day. In Catholic history, there is discrepancy on who St. Valentine's was. Some say he was a martyr of the Christian faith because he would not renounce the faith. Others say he was a priest whom was jailed for defiance of marrying Christian couples and aiding Christians whom were being persecuted during the reign of Claudius in Rome; both of these things were considered a crime. Then once in jail Valentinus (true name of St. Valentine's) attempted to convert the emperor leading to Valentinus' death. While another account states that he was a bishop in Terni where he was beheaded in a purge of priests in an effort to eradicate the faith. Since there are no clear details on who St. Valentine's was the Catholic Church in 1969 decided to drop him out of the Roman calendar and we therefore do not celebrate his feast day. However, he is known as the patron saint of love, lovers, couples, engaged couples, and happy marriages, amongst other things.

The roots of Valentine's Day are supposedly rooted in a Roman festival called Lupercalia that was celebrated on February 15th. On this day a young single man would draw a lady's name in a lottery style fashion and for one year he would have her as a sexual companion [sounds a little scandalous and sexist to me]. Pope Gelasius I decided that this custom was not of virtue so he changed the custom so that both men and women had to choose a name in a similar lottery system, however, the name was now to be that of a saint. The name they choose represented the saint they had to emulate for an entire year. St. Valentine's became the patron of this new feast (instead of Lupercus, the God whom the Romans celebrated on the festival of Lupercalia). Roman men, obviously upset that essentially they did not have a promised sexual partner for a year, still sought the affections of women on this date and would write women messages of love that included the name St. Valentine's.

This Valentine's day was the first one where I am married; and the only one Mike and I will have as a married couple without children. I should have been excited and overjoyed that I didn't have to look for a "valentine" on this day of love...I have one for as long as we both shall live. Yet, this Valentine's Day I was perturbed. For over a month before the day I began hearing about jewelry, chocolate, and flowers. I heard the whisperings of young people looking for dates [substantive or not] for this one night. Honestly, for the first time, I was annoyed with the consumerism following this supposed day of love and the pressure that it created for people around the country to "find a date" or "find a significant other to celebrate this holiday with." How can society put such pressure on everyone to purchase junk that will either spoil, get rotten, or in the case of jewelry, be bought when it's not truly needed; in my opinion expensive jewelry is an over-indulgence, I rather see people fed, housed, and given their most basic necessities than have another ring or necklace.

On the day itself there was one facebook status that caught my attention. It was from a student I worked with while I was the campus minister at the Newman Center in Albuquerque. Lily wrote, "today is not just for couples, it's a celebration of relationships, that being of whomever you wish to share it with - a friend, an animal or even cherishing your relationship with God. We all love something in our lives so cherish it today." Isn't this what we should focus on?!?! It's a day to celebrate all loving relationships! One of my most memorable Valentine's days in college was just hanging out with my girlfriends, and one guy friend, at a Panda Express for dinner. This Valentine's day Mike and I stayed home, ate left over pulled pork sandwiches, and spent time with one another. We didn't go crazy spending money, rather, we spent quality time conversing and enveloping ourselves in the love that we share.

I also think that reflecting upon our relationship with God on this day, and every day, is of utmost importance. Without God there would not be the possibility to feel the love of others. We must thank God daily for the love that we have with our family, friends, and acquaintances, while also simultaneously asking God to help us love others better.

Beyond Valentine's Day, as Christians, don't the Gospels tell us to love our neighbor, love our enemy, love everyone all of the time? Why does our love have to be contained only one day a year on a consumerist, pressured, holiday? Love all of the time. Don't take advantage of the love you have in your life. Tell the people you love that you love them as often as you can, both in actions and words. And lastly don't allow Valentine's Day to "get you down" if you don't have a date with a significant other. This is just society's way of attempting to place labels on people and to have people spend more money on junk they don't need. Cherish and relish the relationships you do have on Valentine's Day; sulking relationships you do not have, on this, in my opinion, secular holiday, does not help you cherish and value the graces that God has already placed in front of you on a daily basis.

Feb. 6th, 2011: "The Power of Boundless Compassion"

A few days ago I finished reading Fr. Greg Boyle SJ's book, Tattoos on the Heart: The Power of Boundless Compassion. I was inspired to read this book following Fr. Boyle's visit and presentation to a group of us in Albuquerque. The book is set in Boyle Heights, inner city Los Angeles. Fr. Boyle, a native of a more affluent part of Los Angeles, has been working in the Boyle Heights neighborhood for over 20 years. In Los Angeles county, according to Fr. Boyle's book, there are approximately 1,100 gangs and 86,000 gang members. In Fr. Boyle's time in Boyle Heights he has buried over 170 young people whom were connected to gangs. One of the poorest, high drug dealing, and most gang inhabited areas in Los Angeles is Boyle Heights. From my reading of his book, Fr. Boyle knew from the start of his placement in Boyle Heights that something needed to change. In 1986 Fr. Boyle created what is now known as Homeboy Industries (http://www.homeboy-industries.org/). Homeboy Industries is a multi-structred rehabilitation and gang intervention center for people who were part of a gang. There are free counseling services, tattoo removal, employment opportunities, legal services, and much more at Homeboy Industries. The book and Fr. Boyle's presentation goes beyond describing the services provided by Homeboy Industries, it breaks down exterior boundaries of tattoos and guns and provides a glimpse of the deep, hurt souls of those whom are bound in lives of turmoil, despair, and feeling unloved. These, for the most part children and young adults, through their encounter with Christ, in one another - including rival gangs, in Fr. Boyle, and in the trust of Homeboy Industries, go from harm and despair to hope and feeling loved.

One of the main themes I gathered from the book and Fr. Boyle's presentation is one that we learned in kindergarten, never judge a book by it's cover. There is always a story behind how and why someone ends up where they end up. And just because someones history is spotty, from our standards, God loves them and they still have a chance for success. To fully appreciate God we must allow ourselves to open our eyes and hearts to everyone, including those who have tattoos and dress like a homey. We must not feel pity for people rather we must be in kinship. When Jesus walked into a room full of people he usually went to the outcasts and sat with them. He ate with them. He didn't act superior to them. Rather, he was one of them...he, himself, was shunned, on the outskirts of society, and seen as different. Jesus was in kinship with the most vulnerable in his time. This is what Fr. Boyle describes, how we must all move towards kinship with those who are most vulnerable in our time. I don't think Fr. Boyle's intention is for all of his readers to work and be with people in gangs; I think Fr. Boyle's intention is much more broad, "Do the thing that is in front of you," spoken by Mother Theresa. This is what I believe is what Fr. Boyle is attempting to get his readers to understand, be in kinship with the most vulnerable in your neighborhoods, cities, and towns. In Albuquerque, in my opinion, the most vulnerable are children - due to the high poverty levels and poor education system we have in the state of New Mexico, immigrants and refugees, people who are homeless, and the incarcerated. We must open our eyes and our hearts to those in front of us. We cannot continue to hide behind our white picket fences and only pray that God will change the unjust structures in our societies; prayer and action are two components of faith that are intertwined so tightly that to have one and not the other will not challenge us to become fully whom Christ created us to become. Kinship, knowing the other, being in solidarity with the other, so that the word "other" one day does not exist, this is what Fr. Boyle and Jesus both challenge us to do.

On Friday night, for our two year anniversary of our proposal, Mike, took me to see the musical, Wicked. The plot to this musical, naturally, is very different from Fr. Boyle's book, yet, there are common threads that I think are important for us to digest. Essentially Wicked is a musical about how the Good Witch and the Wicked Witch of the West from the Wizard of Oz become who they become. It gives us a glimpse of their histories, how they were treated when they were children, and how this influenced choices they made while they were adults. It's a story about betrayal, romance, and friendship. Ultimately I believe it is also about "not judging a book by its cover." There is a reason the Wicked Witch becomes the Wicked Witch (a story I will not tell on my blog, this is a must see musical). Again, we are called to look past the exterior of a person and look into the heart and soul of the person God created him or her to be. We must not allow the media and society to tell us how to look at people, rather, we must meet people face to face, listen to them and respond with care, love, and compassion. We must be in kinship.

I know that the message of this blog is quite simplistic, and some might think trite, yet, I think that we can use the reminder to not judge people, the homeless, gang members, people of different ethnicities, different sexual preferences, etc., and allow God who is within them and whom loves them without boundaries to shine through. We must be vessels of compassion always to everyone. This will allow us to grow closer to Christ. Also it will allow those whom we are showing compassion to, to see and feel Christ. We must also remember it's not about superiority its about kinship. And who knows where kinship and love might take you; you might be the first person to show those living on the margins that they are loved by God. Or, rather, you might recognize the deep love that God has for you.

Feb. 2nd, 2011: Guatemala in My Blood

I just finished reading a fabulous book called, Guatemala In My Blood: How Nursing in Remote Jungle Villages Revolutionized my Life. The book was given to me by a nurse who comes to visit Mike & I weekly to give us, as first time parents, education on prenatal care and will meet with us weekly until Sofia is three years old, continuing our education on raising a child. It's an amazing program for both Mike & I because we have a lot of questions and it's wonderful to have the extra medical support, free of charge. Anyone can enroll in this program, regardless of socio-economic status and regardless of having or not having health insurance. http://www.stjosephnm.org/ I would recommend this program to any first time parents in the Albuquerque area! Our nurse, Sarah, is also an amazing person. She volunteered through the Peace Corps in Morocco, North Africa, where she did community health education (what my mom did in my hometown). And prior to that experience, Sarah, graduated from a Jesuit school in Washington. Anyway, Mike & I feel a connection to Sarah due to her international scope on life. She gave me the book, Guatemala in my Blood, because she knows about my fascination and love of Guatemalan people, we well as Mike's and my desire to, someday, do international missionary work.

The book is set in rural Guatemala in the late 1970s. Liz, a nurse, left her home in Washington, to volunteer with the Maryknoll Missionaries in 1977. She spent most of her time in a small town called Poptun. Liz was actually one of the first lay missionaries to join Maryknoll Missionaries. Prior to this time the only Maryknoll Missionaries were religious sisters, priests, or brothers. Therefore, due to this change in the Maryknoll system of missionary work Liz experienced a lot of challenges as a pioneer in Maryknoll's lay missionary program. Some of the problems she faced were in community life. She lived with several people, mainly priests, in a rectory. In their time as priests these men had not lived with a woman. This created inherit challenges. Another thing that Liz struggled with was the notion that people in the town of Poptun, and surrounding areas, at first would not give her as much clout/authority as a priest. Sadly, in my opinion, this perception of lay ministry is still very prominent across the world. It takes a strong lay person, especially a woman, to work within the Catholic Church, where there is a lot of "putting priests on pedestals", clericalism, and the lack of catechetical education of all practicing Catholics that we are all called to be prophet, priest, and king.

The book seems to give a "real" experience, and not a glorified one, of life in a third world country. It talks about community life, its challenges and its graces. The main focus of Liz's work in Guatemala was with helping establish a health care education program where she and a cohort trained people in Guatemala to be educators of health themselves. These people would train more people to be health care educators. It was created with the idea for it to both be self sustaining and educational for the people of Guatemala on things such as cleanliness, using a latrine, wearing shoes so that parasites could cease to spread, etc. Successfully, through all of the challenges, this program was created and is still flourishing. Guatemala in My Blood, educates the reader on how the program started and continues to live. Lastly, the most profound thing for me, was how Liz feel in love with the Guatemalen culture and people so much to the point that it still is ingrained in her heart. Guatemala and her people are in Liz's heart and are carried out in her actions now in the United States. Now in the United States, she continues to support the people of Poptun in different ways, such as praying for them and sending medical supplies to them. Most profoundly she adopted a young girl, whom now is a young woman, Maria, from Guatemala, whom she loves dearly. Overall, for those interested in Guatemala, missionary work, or a easy good read, I would recommend Guatemala in My Blood as a must read.

Feb. 1st, 2011: A Mother's Sacrifice

I had a tad of an idea, before I got pregnant, about the sacrifices that mothers take the moment they find out they are with child. As many people know mothers give up things such as caffeine, including coffee and soda, alcohol, and artificial sweeteners so that while their baby is in utero s/he will stay healthy. To give these things up for me have been miniscule.

For me, the most challenging portion of this pregnancy has been the dichotomy between taking care of your body to the best of your ability while letting go of what your body does. By letting go of your body I don't mean driving through the McDonalds drive in every day....or stopping to work out. By letting go of your body I mean allowing the natural course of pregnancy upon your body take place without much resistance. There are many things that happen to ones body while one is pregnant that I had no clue about, such as, leg cramps (many times in one night), getting a bloody nose, nausea, less energy, shortness of breath due to the baby and all of your organs pushing up on your lungs, waking up in the middle of the night and not being able to go back to sleep, and naturally, gaining weight. All of these things that occur during pregnancy you have little to no control over. Again, the dichotomy of taking care of your body yet allowing your body to take its natural course during pregnancy is a sacrifice, yet one that I know will be worth it once our baby Sofia is born.

I am drawn back to Mary, the mother of Jesus. She had the ultimate sacrifice, she had to let go of her son, while he was working in ministry and ultimately when he died on the cross. This reflection makes me put into perspective my own sacrifices for Sofia. These small physical changes will pass. The leg cramps will go away. My energy will come back. I will loose the weight. I also reflect upon my own mother. She has told me that when I went to Annunciation House, when she dropped me off, she gave me to God more fully. She knew that the year would be a huge challenge for me and she also knew that the environment on the border (El Paso/Juarez in August 2003) was a bit unruly. She paralleled herself to being Mary and me as Jesus. New life came of the experience of Annunciation House for both my mother and I. My mom has always trusted in God's strength and love but from my perspective it seems as if my Annunciation House experience deepened her relationship with God. For me, Annunciation House taught me many things...but I think the biggest thing I learned while I was there was that life is about a continual cycle of life, death and resurrection. Sometimes life is wonderful, sometimes challenging, sometimes non-eventful....all of these times we must treasure; we must treasure the wonderful times for God's graces during these periods, the challenging times for the opportunity to grow closer to Christ, and the non-eventful times for helping us see God in all things. Death is something we as humans cannot avoid. It happens when something we planned does not occur, it happens when a goal we thought we were going to reach is not within reach, it happens when a loved one dies. These things are not the end...we are resurrection people. We believe that all of these things have a deeper meaning. We believe that if something we planned does not occur its because there is a bigger purpose. We believe that when a loved one dies they are with God, they are now with us in a new way, and we will see them again. Where there is life and death, there is resurrection. Mary learned and knew this. The little crosses I am baring, they too shall pass.

I am also aware that at some point in Sofia's life I will have to give up Sofia to where God is calling her. Maybe she'll have a deep desire to be a missionary in a foreign country (like her mother and father). While both Mike and I would love to raise a daughter who feels compelled to travel the world, help people in need, and be an advocate for social justice, having her leave for a few years to a foreign country would be difficult. We would support her; but having her away for so long would not be easy. Currently this is something that is hard to think about since I am in the beginning stages of being her mother. The point I am trying to make is that a mother's sacrifice is cyclical. There is life, death, and resurrection occurring throughout the intertwined lives of a mother and child. I believe the way to live through these cycles is to remember that God is in control, is with us through every stage, and that there are abundant graces present at every stage, we've just got to recognize God in all things and at all times.

Jan. 31st, 2011: Weddings...weddings...weddings...

This last week I found out about three engagements! This summer, not including the three engagements, my cousin is getting married, a good family friend is getting married, and four former students (2 other weddings) I worked with are getting married! Weddings, for me, if the couple has discerned their relationship thoughtfully and prayerfully, are one of the most exciting and grace-filled moments one can experience in their lifetime.

Honestly, I feel so blessed to have married Mike. He and I both dated some great people in our past...but none of them had everything that God had envisioned for us. There was always something within those relationships that left us both wanting more; something within us that was left untapped. We had to be patient and set aside our time lines to allow God to work within our lives. When we met in person, after a month of long emails and 2-3 hour phone conversations, we both knew that God had helped us to build a solid foundation for a deep faith-filled relationship. Our wedding day was a solidification of God's plan for our future. And the amazing part for me was that I felt God's presence that entire weekend very strongly, whether it was through the prayers stated at the wedding ceremony itself, my friends, family, or Mike. The wedding was simple; it focused on God, one another, our family and friends. In a consumerist society where a wedding day is not necessarily about God, I found myself at my wedding thinking about God constantly.

I hope and pray that the marriages that I will witness this summer will be as grace-filled as ours. Finding the person whom God created for you is a blessing. For those of you who feel called to married life but have not found the right person, yet, don't loose hope. God would not place that deep desire, vocation, in your heart, without someone in mind for you. You just need to be patient and wait for God's timing. I honestly can say I grew impatient at points in my life, waiting for God to introduce me to Mike, almost to the point of growing jaded. I always thought, well I have a MDiv, I am seeped in my faith and my family, there is no way in this world I am going to find my match...I'll have to settle for someone who is not as thrilled about their faith, or someone who cannot have a theological conversation with me, or someone who is not as passionate about social justice as myself. I thought that my standards were too high. But I am thrilled I waited for God to place the right person in my life at the right time. Nothing is impossible for God. Let us close this blog entry with a blessing for engaged couples, especially for the seven engaged couples I know, from the Catholic book of blessings.

"Lord God, the source of all love, the wise plan of your providence has brought these young people together. As they prepare themselves for the sacrament of marriage and pray for your grace, grant that, strengthened by your blessing, they may grow in their respect for one another and cherish each other with a sincere love. We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen."

January 17th, 2011: I am Pregnant!

Twelve week ultrasound of
Sofia Rose

Hello!! Besides the last post on my Titi Rosie, it has been months since I have blogged! I apologize to my fans. Teehee. As many of you know I am 27 weeks pregnant today. The first trimester I was tired and nauseated all of the time. I had little energy to do anything but work, workout, cook, and sleep. The second trimester has been a lot better, health wise, but I found no time to blog due to the holidays. Now we are at the end of our second trimester...one more week until our third trimester...and I am finally finding time to blog.

As I write this blog I feel little Sofia Rose kicking and squirming. Today she kicked me ten times in less than three minutes! I have started another website just for Sofia. Primarily it will give occasional updates on how she is doing while she in my belly and it also has our registry information. The registry information at this point is not completed. We have three registries up and running but we have not finished sorting what we really need and comparing costs at all three locations. If you look at all of the sites now they are pretty sparse. Here is the website:
http://chineaandshawverbaby.ourbabychannel.com/

This particular blog is not merely about sharing the new site. The next few blogs will be about my thoughts and prayers since the start of this pregnancy.

How did we decide on Sofia Rose's name? Mike and I talked about names for pretty much the whole first trimester....some names he would "veto" others I would "veto". Then we came up with Sofia's name because of this: We like the name Sofia beacuse it means wisdom and is one of the names in the Bible that refers to the Holy Spirit. The spelling of Sofia is intentional...we like the Spanish spelling of her name. We like the middle name Rose because both of my grandmothers are named Rosa, my aunt Rose, and Mike's grandmother Rose.

The 2010 Advent season for me was particularly revealing. In the past I had thought and prayed about the vocation of motherhood but this year, since it is a reality, I am already a mother, Advent took on a whole new meaning. I am currently feeling all the baby movements that Mary also felt within her. I am also waiting in anticipation, a sense of awe, an unrelenting yes to my calling from God to be a mother, and also a sense of nervousness - which I am sure Mary felt even though it is not mentioned in the Gospels. (Every mother, no matter their age, race, religious background, no matter how ready she may feel, I believe has a sense of nervousness.)

One question I asked myself a lot in the first trimester was...am I truly ready to be a mother? On June 5th of this year Mike and I got married. It feels too quick for us to be parents. But at the same time I am 30 years old and Mike is 36. God has blessed both of us with full lives. We have both traveled, studied, made many friends, and loved our families deeply. We both have truly wanted a family, even before we met one another. Since we are older we feel a little more wisdom about life than we did when we were in our 20s. So, why not now? I reflected upon this during the Advent season. Did Mary truly feel ready? I think beyond Mary feeling ready she felt a deep sense of God calling her to be a mother. She let go of everything. She surrendered herself completely to God, including her pride and public image, to be the mother of Jesus. This is the type of love I want to embody. I want to surrender myself to God's will and allow God to use me in whatever way God sees fit. Even though I don't have as much to surrender to God as Mary did, as my circumstances are different, I not only feel the calling from God to be a mother but I am running towards God with open arms asking, what's next Lord?

Even though Advent is over, Mike and I, are still in the process of waiting. Day by day, hour by hour, Sofia is growing. These past few weeks I have felt her move more and more. What I am trying to stay with is the joy in the anticipation. Enjoying every moment of this pregnancy for me is of utmost importance. How many times in ones lifetime is one pregnant? I believe there is joy in learning, feeling, and loving every moment of the here and now.

Please, continue to pray for Sofia, Mike & I. Pray for Sofia's health and growth. Pray that as Mike and I prepare to become parents we stay healthy in mind, body, and soul so that we can be the parents that God has created us to be.